I was recently introduced to the book “What’s Your Poo Telling You?”, which is an amazing piece that chronicals the different types of poop, descriptions of what causes it, and what that shit can tell you about your body. It’s awesome. It’s done very well — an interesting combination of humor, funny pictures, and real (medical) information about doody.

And, if I can say so myself, it does a pretty solid job of identifying the many, varied types of poop. And it’s very informative at the same time. Ever wonder “why the hell is that turd floating?“. It answers all kinds of stuff like that. And even gives funny pictures to go along with it.

Just so you guys know what I’m talking about, I’ve included an excerpt from the book. This is certainly one I know everyone’s experienced. Especially after your friend invites you over for dinner, and it happens to be “Mexican Night”. Uh oh…

And the picture that goes with “Number Three”

Amazing, right? Now, the interesting thing is that I have recently gotten a new phone. And my new phone has the age-old game “Brickbreaker” on it. Now, every time I take a poop, I have to play Brickbreaker. I wouldn’t necessarily call it an addiction, as much as a passion. it passes the time and challenges me physically at the same time.

Now, you’re wondering how this relates. I’ll tell you. I have become convinced the size, shape, and quantity of my poop directly correlates with how well I do in my Brickbreaker game. I’m not sure if there is some cosmic forces in the universe that connects my Blackberry with my colon, but I’m telling you – I can tell how well I’m going to do in the game by how big and satisfying my doody is.

So, I decided to create my own entry for “What’s Your Poo Telling You?”.

Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have to go to the bathroom.

I feel a High Score coming…