This week’s flog is another selection from PMP’s IdiotPantsParty. Make sure to check out the blog every few days for new additions to the idiot dictionary…

#6 The Carlos Mencia

The Carlos Mencia is the Grim Reaper of joketelling. He is to comedy what WalMart is to quality merhcandise. Always shitty. Like a Ghost of Comedians Past, The Carlos Mencia will steal jokes you once loved and rehash them into some generic “Beaner” garbage.

The Carlos Mencia does not need to be a stand-up comedian. You’ll know him as the Guy that shows up at parties, uninvited, with an sack full of dogshit jokes. The same ones you heard last week and the week before that. Sterotypical knee-slappers such as:

“Oohh, look at that truck. I bet you could fit 12 Beaners in there!” and “If a Mexican was President, we’d all have seistas!!”

The jokes are always the same, often peppered with menial catch-phrases and yelling. It’s “comedy” that’ll make you gauge your eyes out. Yet, the Carlos Mencia lacks all self-awarness. Despite the obvious displeasure of those around, his loud mouth will continue to run.

And though you may try to ignore him – to make it blatantly clear that his comedic shtick is unbearable — he will not stop. As long as there is air in the room to breath and energy to siphon out, he won’t go away.

Based off of the intolerable Carlos Mencia of Comedy Central “fame”, this buzzkill will continue to haunt your life long after you’ve forgotten about him. You may go months without seeing him, but as soon as you let your guard down, The Carlos Mencia will reappear. With a fresh set of material from 1988.

Overexposure to the Carlos Mencia often causes a momentary loss of faith in god, as the recipient wonders, “Why me?”. The constant retelling of old jokes may cause feelings of amnesia and dizziness, and too much Mencia can trigger the sensation of “being in hell”.

Although it is particularly effective, the Carlos Mencia doesn’t have to be of the Mexican decent. In fact, they most likely will be of a heritage entirely different from the one they tell racial jokes about. Just like the real Carlos Mencia. All they really need is an unjustified sense of comedic confidence and a knack for being annoying. Really, really annoying.