I recommend you light a candle, relax, and play “I Saw the Sign” by Ace of Bass as a soundtrack to this clip.

Ouch.

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If you ever drink beer, go to parties, or like to bob your head, you need to check this guy out.

Girl Talk (aka Greg Gillis) is a DJ based out of Pittsburgh, PA who specializes in the hotness, otherwise known as “sample-based remixes”. That basically means he takes elements from about 15 different songs and mashes them up into one huge, f**king awesome “new” track.

Because he samples about 1000 artists in his new CD “Feed The Animals“, the music is technically “illegal”. So he’s doing a Radiohead-type deal where you can make a donation, or in my case, get the album for $00.00. So you have no excuse to not get it.

Girl Talk - “No Pause”

It’s one of the best party albums I’ve heard all year. Boo ya!

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A time-cherished tradition is slowly being erroded and washed away right before my eyes. The tradition is called “Deep Cuts”, and within my friend group, it’s something we hold dear.

So what is a “deep cut”? Simple. Deep Cuts is the game of old friends. The point is to bring up a mutual acquaintance that has been long washed-over by the seas of time — someone that you both knew, but haven’t thought about for years. Shock your friend with a jarring memory and an embarrassing story. The goal is to cut deep, the bigger the “holy shit” reaction, the more points you score, and thusly, the more street cred you receive.

I’ll give you an example. Let’s say we are talking about Ashton Kutcher and I said, “Yeah, well he’s no Tom Green”. See? We all remember that horse-penis-sucking bastard, but no one’s thought about him in years. Now this would be a pretty poor deep cut — actually more like a scratch — because it wasn’t that long ago he was popular.

A better example would be, “Yeah, well he’s no Alex Winter”. Exactly. Who? Alex Winter was Keanu Reeves co-star in the Bill and Ted movies. Anyway, the point of the game isn’t doing it with celebrities, it’s doing it with people you grew up with. (And making fun of said people is an added bonus.)

But there is a monster lurking on the internet trying to kill Deep Cuts. It knows your high school and your history, and shows no remorse for personal space. And it’s name is Facebook. (more…)

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It’s hard for a guy to leave that 1st voicemail for a girl after just meeting her. You want to make sure you make a good first phone impression. Girls love good phone.

But here’s a guy that puts it all on the line. There’s no video, but it’s amazing. The first voice message is unsettling, but the second one really takes his douchiness to the next level. Make sure you stick around to the end, he won’t disappoint.

How is that guy single??! He’s a catch. He even says it himself. Come on, gals. Any guy that approaches you on the street and gives you voicemail ultimatums is a keeper.

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Can you guess what the Banana’s doing?

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Here’s a great video from one of my personal heros, Larry David, doing what he does best: complaining. But it’s for a good cause. Cancer. And how it’s ruining he’s street cred as a bald man.

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Luckily, I was taught at a young age to stay away from gangs and violence. After all, it’s dangerous. Bunch of dudes just rollin around, lookin’ for trouble.

But I gotta say, Momma didn’t teach me about THESE kind of street tuffs. I’m actually frightened.

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In a move that left most Americans saying, “So that’s what stinks”, a commision in San Fransisco is asking voters to change the name of a feces-treatment plant to the “George W. Bush Sewage Plant.”

Needless to say, the Republicans in the city were not too happy with the idea. Said Howard Epstein, Chairman of the Republican Party:

“You got a bunch of drunk guys who came up with an idea,” Epstein said, “and want to put on the ballot as a big joke without regard to the city’s governance or cost.”

Drunk or not, the idea is gaining support. And a majority vote in November would make the name change official, sending loads of “Bush” down the toilet.

Yet, Epstein can’t take the name change as a total loss. Before settling on the “George W. Bush Sewage Plant”, he managed to veto several other names:

Bush League Shit Storage
The George W. Shit Supply
George W. Bush’s “I Don’t Remember Eating Peanuts” Plant
The Bush is a Hairy Vagina Sewage Center
George W. Bush’s Barrel of Bodily Blunders
The Bush is Full of Shit Factory
The George W. Bush Is The Worst President in the History of the USA Dump

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This is a kick-ass song that Beck released in September of last year. Like any good, crazy Scientologist would do, he released this single by itself, with no album or anything.

Crazy Zenu-loving bastard or not, this guy can blow minds with rock. Oh, and I recommend you take this music video with 2-4 tabs of acid.

Beck - “Time Bomb”

Beck’s got a new CD called “Modern Guilt” coming out next month (July 8). So look forward to that.

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Something magical happens when George Lucas gets involved in a modern-day film. He’s got what I’d like to call the “JarJar Touch”, in that everything he touches turns into a commercialized, CGI-infested crapfest.

This is a hilarious documentary chronicling about what might happen if George Lucas were to remake “Lord of the Rings”.

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You’ve heard the expression “If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it”. Well, after watching this skateboarder, I’m thinking there should be a new saying: “If it’s broke, just leave it”.

I know he’s super emosh about the board breaking, but this Dude’s got one more surprise coming.

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Here’s one of my favorite tracks off of Weezer’s new Red Album. It’s a modern day rock opera — goes all the way from rap to piano to huge guitar, all in awesome Weezer fashion.

A friend of mine called it the new “Bohemian Rhapsody”. And I kinda liked that analogy. So sit down, cuz your going for a ride…

Weezer - “The Greatest Man That Ever Lived”

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